Decisiveness and Perseverance

Note : After many days I am going to write about some stupidness of mine!

Decisiveness is the ability to see clearly through fog and arrive at a conclusion.

Perseverance is the ability to act on your decision no matter how many times you fail.

Having defined the terms lets go to the story.

I came across a group (cannot give name here) and after being cautious for many days, i thought its time to be active in the group and so I started involving in its activities.

Time went on and everyone started liking me but I thought with few changes the group can do miracles and I conveyed the same to the president of the group. He was impressed and we decided to implement our idea.

So far so good.

Tadaaa!!

I suddenly started getting few illuminations and realized this group is not the right one for me and so i decided to drop out. (our goal is same but our approached are different)

This is the decision I took.

But I started to involve in the group again. I told myself many reasons, I want to change the group, have to help someone, let me just keep in touch with them etc etc

This is where I started failing my decision.

Abracadabraa!!

I had very long discussion (partly argument ) with the president of the group. I tell how things have to be and he supports why the things are like they are and it went on and on. It continued till 5 am of saturday morning.

This is the stupid thing I did, just not failed my decision but failed it miserably!

I have to speak only that much necessary and never argue . This is what decided many days and I failed this too.

I lost energy, so much energy and was damn tired!

I tired all sorts of things to rejuvenate but nothing worked. I tried sleeping, relaxing, hanging out, movies, music, eating and nothing worked.

As the clock showed 10 pm on sunday night, I decided to keep my laziness aside and spend some time in nature.

In the silence of night, with cloudy sky above and surrounded by many plants/trees I spent 1 and half hour and

Zapaak!!

I am back!!

After two days of uneasiness I finally feel relaxed now.

One funny thing happened, as I looked above I saw clouds moving fast and suddenly there it is!

A star shaped cloud.

and A deer, nope three of them,

then a rabbit

and leopard and many more!!

Its like a jungle and they were moving fast. I forgot myself and laughed (a childish laugh grown ups would lose with age) and I loved it!!

Oh, I digressed. Let us come back.

So I failed my decision and had to suffer for two days (weekend man!!).

Now I again told myself, "No more involvement in the group whatever the voice inside my head might tell"

This is perseverance!

Friends, many times we take certain decisions and fail ourselves (very badly). We face the consequences and scold ourselves for the weakness. But remember if you start trying again, it means you are a courageous person.

And my experience says that there is no need to scold yourself no matter how badly you fail yourself. It means you have something unfinished and have to learn something over there (no arguments/unnecessary discussions is the lesson in my case).

And remember all that matters is whether you are trying again or not! (Perseverance my friends!)